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Freendode’s #perlcafe Channel

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Freenode’s #perlcafe is a symbiont channel to #perl. It was originally intended to host off-topic discussion and discussion about advanced topics, so #perl will remain more focused on beginner problems. That did not work quite as expected, but nevertheless #perlcafe took off, and now hosts a lot of discussion that most people feel would rather not be hosted on #perl. (Albeit sometimes the discussion there is more high-quality.)

Brief history

rindolf registered #perlcafe back in 24 September 2004. The name was inspired by the Haskell-Cafe mailing list, which is intended to move advanced and off-topic discussions off the main mailing list. While having some initial flurry of activity, #perlcafe ended up very quiet shortly afterwards.

It all changed, one night when rindolf spent all night talking on #perl, ended up getting de-voiced, and ended up /msg’ing some #perl people he recognised and asking them to join #perlcafe. Afterwards, #perlcafe really took off.

Note about the #perlcafe Attitude

You can often hear a lot of racist statements, cursing, etc. on #perlcafe. But don’t worry - the people there know better than that, and are not really racist. "#perlcafe is not racist. It is offensive to everyone equally.". Especially, what is said on #perlcafe can be:

  1. Anti-Semitic.
  2. Jewish-elitist.
  3. Anti-Israeli.
  4. Anti-Muslim.
  5. Sexist. (Against either or both genders).
  6. Anti-USArian.
  7. Anti-Canadian.
  8. Anti-French.
  9. Self-deprecating.

So don’t take what is said there too seriously.


There’s a variant of bad English used by some of the channel regulars to speak there, even though they know much better than that. It is somewhat different from the LOLCats variant and predates it. Here’s a non-exhaustive guide on how to Café-speak:

"I R going", "he gaved me a present", "I likes cats", etc.

Use the incorrect inflection of the verb.

"n u"

Short for "No you."

"ghey", "hawt", "phag", "teh", "dum"

Purposeful mispelling of words.

"Hell cl0ud"

"Hell" is a one-letter shorter version of "Hello", but serves a similar meaning in the café.

/me cl0ud railbait dabreegster

Sometimes people greet each other by using /me followed by a list of links to their friends which they can see. The friends are expected to reciprocate.

Common Topics

North American Politics

It’s not uncommon to see the #perlcafe-ers paste some quotes from North American newspapers or web-sites regarding relatively obscure North American politics. We allow such things on #perlcafe, because we’d rather not see them on #perl.

Computer Games

One common topic in #perlcafe is computer games. Normally cutting-edge "gamer" games, mostly for Microsoft’s Game Launcher or for consoles. Some of the channel’s regulars are fond of playing such games, and like to discuss them.

Shania Twain

Apparently, rindolf is the only computer geek who likes Shania Twain’s songs, much to the dismay of the other channel regulars. (Some of whom are still fond of Ms. Twain’s looks.) As such he sometimes say * rindolf is listening to with a song of hers. This makes almost everyone else unhappy, and comment to rindolf that he should adopt a better musical taste.

   <jkauffman>	like if I went to your house and you started playing Shania Twain,
               I’d have to set fire to your computer

From #perlcafe

   <tag> rindolf: sort of like you were about shania twain, you know joking right?
   <rindolf> tag: but I actually bought a Shania Twain CD.
   * tag smacks rindolf
   <tag> wrong answer
   * rindolf is listening to Shania Twain - Up!
   <rindolf> I eventually found the B.E.P and Pink Floyd CDs in a different store.
   <tag> rindolf: dude you are so full of shit
   <tag> rindolf: you can listen to glitch and then blast mozart, but nobody
         likes pink floyd AND shania twain
   <tag> nobody likes *both* of those things.

From #perl (rindolf apparently belongs to the empty set).

The /topic

The /topic is world-editable. We gave up on keeping up a meaningful /topic, and instead opt for some funny quotes. Feel free to set the topic to whatever you feel like. Here are some past selected topics:

  1. “I have always wished that my computer would be as easy to use as my telephone. My wish has come true. I no longer know how to use my telephone.” - Bjarne Stroustrup
  2. Happy Birthday Rindolf, you crazy bastard | <sili> my moths. let me show you them
  3. infidel planes bombed somalia
  4. Sometimes, loving your neighbor means taking him to an old Soviet interrogation facility and shoving things up his ass. -- Republican Jesus
  5. (define (recommend-movie) "miller's crossing") | <ik> keep coldhak off our streets
  7. I’m The Scat Man | <sili_> another reason i want a different job | <sili_> i’m tired of "... but php doesn’t ..."
  8. YEY I’m on bash ^_^
  9. < GumbyBRAIN> We don’t ever have to poop but i did tonight! :: <Chris62vw> for rindolf <GumbyBRAIN> Hi all, anyone know a bot.
  10. a glorious day | <SubStack> cl0ud: do you know of any other planets and plantedoids worth visiting in this quadrant? | <cl0ud> SubStack: sagittarius * is my next vacation spot
  11. #perlcafe - where misfits fit. | Lady_Aleena puts the Perl in #perlcafe | mst is the Bastard Flamer from #perl. | rindolf is passive aggressive. | ispy eats children? | railbait has been sentenced to concatenation | Perl and CPAN are OFFTOPIC! | cl0ud has a glorious scalar localtime()